Friday, April 26, 2013

The Projector: Roided Out Edition UPDATE

Sunday UPDATE: It was the calm before the man-in-the-flying-iron-suit storm over the weekend. Pain & Gain was underwhelming at best, with Paramount claiming the roid-rager broke the $20M barrier — a sum that spins better than it's likely actual, $19.7M. The Big Wedding crashed with a pathetic $7.5M, adding to Robin Williams' lengthy string of box office busts. With the overall weekend down 12% from 2012, there's a superhuman surge in business soaring in Friday, as Iron Man 3 lands after a $195M opening overseas — that figure surpassing The Avengers first weekend overseas sum. Does this mean we're on the verge of an Avengers-level opening stateside, $207M, possibly more? Not quite that astronomically high, but in the $190M range? Locked and loaded.

1. Pain & Gain $20M
2. Oblivion $17.4M
3. 42 $10.7M
4. The Big Wedding $7.5M
5. The Croods $6.6M


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What's up with The Rock? Aside from showing up in every third movie released at the multiplex – Pain & Gain the latest – guy has become more swoll than Lee Haney in his prime. I'm not sure if you're aware of this physiological fact: 40-year-old dudes don't get more balloon-like as they age — as appears to be the case with the ex-WWE champ. Now don't take that as a suggestion The Brahma Bull may be using banned substances, but — ah heck, that's precisely what I'm suggesting.
  1. Pain & Gain $24M - Mr. Bombastic himself, Michael Bay mans the cam for this based-on-a true-story dramedy of a bunch of roided-out freaks who kidnap a richie. Hard to pin down interest — are folks sitting this weekend out, waiting for Iron Man 3?
  2. Oblivion $17.5M - Solid – not spectacular – opening for Tom Cruise's live action, non-robotic-trash compactor version of WALL-E. Legs are questionable at best — IM3 will obliterate the thing a week from today.
  3. The Big Wedding $12M - Consider this the wedding-themed edition of Valentine's Day and New Year's Eve — a shedload of stars crammed into one crappy movie.
  4. 42 $11.5M - Surpasses the $60M mark this weekend. Stellar week-to-week holds thanks to superb word of mouth.
  5. The Croods $6.5M - With $400M+ banked worldwide, DreamWorks Animation lays the groundwork for a sequel.