Friday, April 20, 2012

The Weekend Projector: Schlockfest Edition

Welcome to the first weekend of 2012 that features not a single new release of major significance. April is traditionally a month littered with dreck and the slate of offerings being dished out by Hollywood today more than back that fact. When Zac Efron is your headline act, it's time to hit up Redbox.

  1. The Lucky One ($22M) - Consider yourself to be quite fortuitous if you aren't dragged to a theater and forced to endure this latest Nicholas Sparks schlockfest. But given the recent track record of romantic schlockfests - 'The Vow' ($124M), 'Dear John' ($80M gross), et al. - expect decent bank for this love-a-thon with just a dash of PTSD for dramatic effect.
  2. Think Like a Man ($21.5M) - Should be a very tight race for the top slot as the bestselling Steve Harvey book comes to the big screen.
  3. The Hunger Games ($11M) - Is this finally the weekend that Katniss and crew take a 50% tumble? The thing has grossed $535M worldwide - should top $600M by Monday.
  4. The Three Stooges ($10.5M) - As the lone "family" flick in the marketplace, expect a strong hold for the slapstick trio after a solid opening.
  5. The Cabin in the Woods ($8.5M) - Fears that its genius would sail over moviegoers' heads were confirmed - the maniacal monster mash received a 'C' score - preposterous. 
  6. Chimpanzee ($8M) - After bringing us the 'Earth', 'Oceans' and 'African Cats', Disneynature takes us inside the world of face-shredding pseudo-monkeys.